Dreaming certainly hasn't been an easy concept for us to help our kids see the possibilities that the world had to offer. As you can probably imagine after getting married at 17 & 18 years old, there was very little dreaming that was even whispered in our house. We didn't dare! We didn't have time and we needed to focus on the reality of keeping food on the table and a roof over our head. We found we were just living our lives. Tom and I were not in a position to help our kids see the world of possibilities for their lives. We were being hypocritical to encourage our kids to see their lives for all that life could bring them when we were only seeing our lives for the "reality" of doing what needed to be done just to make ends meet. Recently, we finished reading a book by Bruce Wilkinson called "The Dream Giver". Chasing A Dream - What an extraordinary idea in a world where we are expected to work hard, keep your head down and give your best all the time? But was dreaming for us? Was dreaming something we could help our kids believe in when we live in a world of "reality" vs "fantasy"? Dreaming was just for dreamers and for those that lived in "reality" it was not possible to make dreams come true.
As our children grew older and started expressing their hopes and dreams for their lives, we knew that we wanted to help them achieve all that was on their hearts. Whether it was to be the best horse trainer in the nation, public speaker, veterinarian or architect, we knew that we had an obligation to help our kids achieve all that had been placed on their hearts. Like every other area in our parenting, we knew helping the kids believe in their dreams wasn't going to be something that we could encourage just by words alone, but, we needed to show them through example. About 7 years ago, we were introduced to an idea that awakened those dreams of our youth from their slumber. Tom and I took our dreams down off the shelf and started to dust them off. We had to start believing that the vision, hopes and dreams that we had were a possibility. Of course, there were hecklers, people that thought we were crazy (actually that we had completely fallen off/out of our rockers), people that wanted to protect us from ourselves. But, we knew what we had at risk - our kids! If we didn't believe in ourselves and our dreams, we couldn't even begin to show them how we believed in their dreams!
The biggest question that weighed on our minds though was how in the world do we take the dreams that had been placed on our hearts and make them reality. God had placed a seed in our heart to be and do more. In order for the dreams that had been placed on our hearts, we had to create a vision that could/would come to reality! Dreams only come true when you have a solid plan in place. We owed to ourselves to be the example that our kids needed and if we were going to make their dreams come true, we needed to have a road map to get us to the desired destination.
As we have slid into 2016 and certainly by now the majority of resolutions that you made on January 1 are likely becoming a bit faded, we wanted to share a bit of insight we've gained over the past 7 years that have helped us create the road maps to create a vision and belief to make our dreams come true, as well as, help our kids know that their dreams are valued enough to believe in the possibility that theirs can come true, as well. These tips are what we've created as a family that have helped us all gained a bigger belief in creating the life we want.
1. Keep It Real!! Start with the end in mind! Know what you want when you get there!
Dream as a family - As a family, we have spent many hours sitting around the dining table, cutting pictures and words of belief out of magazines to put on a vision board. In order to have a belief in any dream, it's important to be able to visualize it in bright and living colors. When the kids can see you are invested in helping them create their dreams, they get pretty excited and get more determined in making their visions come true.
2. Create A Timeline.
When you have your vision board in place, it's now time to set dates for your dreams to be accomplished. It's time to make your dreams reality. You can only make a dream a reality when you place a timeline on it. Do the same thing with your kids. Help them make small goals to get to the big goal (you do the same). For instance, Tate has a dream of winning the NFR. In order to do that, we have helped him develop some goals that we can do over the next year to help him grow his belief in himself. We have helped him build a spur board. We let him know we are invested in his success by sending him to a bronc riding school with a world champion. These small steps consistently followed over time will provide a pathway for Tate to accomplish his BIG DREAM!
3. Keep It In Sight.
Out of sight, out of mind! You need to place your vision board where you can see it daily. The same with your child's. Help them find a place where they can see their dreams daily. Talk to them about their dreams. Then let them talk to you about theirs. When your kids become invested in your dreams, it brings a lot more meaning to your dreams. Your kids will be your biggest cheerleaders and champions. Speaking your dreams aloud is also important in making them a reality. Your mind has to become a player in the belief. Your doubting mind can be a road block, so you have to take control and feed it with powerful thoughts.
4. Protect Your Dream
You will have people that appear as if they care about you, but, out of their fear that you might fail, might succeed or leave them behind along the way that are Dream Stealers. Dream Stealers will be disguised as people that you believe love you the most. Remember, your dream and your kids' dreams depend on you to guard and protect them. If you don't remain steadfast, little attacks will defeat the importance of your dream and eventually you will lose the value of achieving your big dream.
5. Be Accountable to Your Dream
So many of us have our dreams, The Dream Giver book states "How do we keep chasing them and keep going on?" It's really easy when you have a dream no matter how big or how small to just let them remain on the shelf. But, in order to make them become a reality, we have to nurture them like a garden. You need to till the soil, plant the seeds, water the garden, fertilize it and from time to time pull the weeds. Dreams take time to happen, stay steadfast. You may have a few times where you feel like you've gotten completely off track, but, keep moving forward. If your path to success looks like a bit like a winding road, who cares? When you get to the top, will you really scold yourself for the route that you took to get there or will you celebrate your dream?!?! Keep steadfast, because you have the eyes of your baby directly on you and your success. Don't give up! You are their hero! You are who they model themselves after! You are the example that they follow!
We are more determined than ever to achieve the dreams that have always been on our heart. God has placed big dreams on our hearts! Together with our children we will all achieve the plans God has well laid out for our lives, but, only if we remain steadfast and follow his words in Habukuk 2:2-3 "Then the Lord replied:'Write down the revelation and make it plain on tablets so that a herald may run with it. For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay."
'Til Next Time, Keep Stickin' 2-Gether!
Tom & Carrie